#include <nonsense.h>
#include <lies.h>
#include <spyware.h> /* Biblioteca de Conectare Microsoft Network */ 
#include <process.h> /* Pentru Curtea de Justitie */

#define say(x) lie(x)
#define computeruser ALL_WANT_TO_BUY_OUR_BUGWARE 
#define next_year soon
#define the_product_is_ready_to_ship another_beta_version 

void main()
{
	if (latest_window_version>one_month_old) 
	{
		if (there_are_still_bugs)
			market(bugfix);
		if (sales_drop_below_certain_point)
			raise(RUMOURS_ABOUT_A_NEW_BUGLESS_VERSION); 
	}
	while(everyone_chats_about_new_version) 
	{
		make_false_promise(it_will_be_multitasking); /* Apelare Standard, in lie.h */
		if (rumours_grow_wilder)
			make_false_promise(it_will_be_plug_n_play); 
		if (rumours_grow_even_wilder)
		{
			market_time=3Dripe;
			say("Va fi finalizat intr-o luna");
			order(programmers, stop_fixing_bugs_in_old_version);
			order(programmers, start_brainstorm_about_new_version); 
			order(marketingstaff, permission_to_spread_nonsense);
			vapourware=3DTRUE;
			break;
		}
	}
	switch (nasty_questions_of_the_worldpress) 
	{
		case WHEN_WILL_IT_BE_READY:
		say("Va fi finalizat in", today+30_days," noi doar il mai testam"); 
		break;
		case WILL_THIS_PLUG_AND_PLAY_THING_WORK: say("Da va functiona");
		ask(programmers, why_does_it_not_work); 
		pretend(there_is_no_problem);
		break;
		case WHAT_ARE_MINIMAL_HARDWARE_REQUIREMENTS:
			say("Va rula pe un 8086 cu viteza uimitoare datorita arhitecurii de 32 biti");
		inform(INTEL, "Vanzarile Pentium vor creste extrem de mult"); 
		inform(SAMSUNG, "Construieste o noua fabrica de cipuri de menorie pentru ca toti clientii vor necesita cel putin 320 de MB");
		inform(QUANTUM, "Multumita noii FATware vanzarile se vor tripla"); 
		get_big_bonus(INTEL, SAMSUNG, QUANTUM);
		break;
		case DOES_MICROSOFT_GET_TOO_MUCH_INFLUENCE:
			say("Oh nu, suntem aici doar ca sa facem o lume mai buna pentru toti");
		register(journalist, Big_Bill_Book); 
		when(time_is_ripe)
		{
			arrest(journalist);
			brainwash(journalist);
			when(journalist_says_windows95_is_bugfree) 
			{
				order(journalist, "scrie un articol obiectiv"); 
				release (journalist);
			}
		}
		break;
	}
	while (vapourware)
	{
		introduction_date++; /* Intarziere */
		if (no_one_believes_anymore_there_will_be_a_release) 
			break;
		say("Va fi gata in",today+ONE_MONTH); 
	}
	release(beta_version)
	while (everyone_is_dumb_enough_to_buy_our_bugware) 
	{
		bills_bank_account +=3D 150*megabucks;
		release(new_and_even_better_beta_version); 
		introduce(more_memory_requirements);
		if (customers_report_installation_problems) 
		{
			say("este o problema legata de hard si nu de softt"); 
			if (smart_customer_says_but_you_promised_plug_and_pla y)
			{
				ignore(customer);
				order(microsoft_intelligence_agency, "Fi-ti cu ochii pe tipu’ asta");
			}
		}
		if (there_is_another_company)
		{
			steal(their_ideas);
			accuse(company, stealing_our_ideas);
			hire(a_lot_of_lawyers); /* in process.h */
			wait(until_other_company_cannot_afford_another_law suit); 
			buy_out(other_company);
		}
	}
	/* Acum cand toti au realizat ca noi vindem bugware si toti sunt suparati pe noi > >*/
	order(plastic_surgeon, make_bill_look_like_poor_guy); 
	buy(nice_little_island);
	hire(harem);
	laugh_at(everyone, for_having_the_patience_year_after_year_for_anothe r_unfinished_version); 
}


void bugfix(void)
{
	charge (a_lot_of_money)
	if (customer_says_he_does_not_want_to_pay_for_bugfix) 
		say("Nu este un bugfix ci o versiune noua");
	if (still_complaints)
	{
		ignore(customer);
		register(customer, big_Bill_book);
		/* Il vom prinde cand toti vor folosi Billware!!*/ 
	}
}